His evaluation went on for a couple of months in school. He had psychological, learning, and social history assessments, speech-language and neurological evaluations and occupational therapy. We sat with learning consultants, case managers, and special ed teachers and the final diagnosis was PDD-NOS which stands for Pervasive Developmental Disorder Not Otherwise Specified. PDD-NOS lies at the mild end of the vast Autism Spectrum. When my husband and I were given the news I obviously took it very hard. I blamed myself and had many sleepless nights trying to figure out what I did wrong during and after my pregnancy. If there was anything that I wanted for my son was for him to not be like me. I cried because it was the one trait from me that I did not want him to have and I continued to blame myself even more. As a child I overcame a lot of difficulties and I do not want my son to have it as difficult as I did. I did not speak until I was 7 years old and I was in and out of doctor's offices because they could not figure out what was wrong or why I acted the way I did. I read my son's report which was half an inch thick over and over and over again because it did not sink in the first few times. Each time I read his classroom evaluations it brought tears to my eyes. I could not believe he was having such a hard time in class socializing and fitting in with the rest of the first graders. It was like kindergarten all over again. He seemed almost alienated from the school world yet at home he is as normal and as happy as any child who has lots and lots to say. The evaluations brought back a lot of childhood memories and I found myself coping all over again with a painful past and now a present. If I can at least take some comfort in all of this is that it relieves me to know that my son is nowhere near the way I was at his age and I also take comfort because today, you look at me and you would have never realized there was/or is something wrong with me.
I often wonder if a diagnosis of PDD-NOS is just a cop out medical label that professionals place on extraordinary children who often disrupt a class because their brains need more stimulation. "Sure, you have a very, very smart and sweet boy but he doesn't act like the other children so lets put a label on him just because we cannot pin point what is really wrong". Since when was being smart, curious, intellectually advanced, having a high attention to detail, and being shy a medical problem? So, he is not an athletic jock and you think there is a problem because he is a bookworm? Seriously??!! Regardless, my son will always be my smart, gentle, loving, and caring child. It fills my heart with joy to see how happy he is and to me, my son Simon will always be the most beautiful color in this complicated autism spectrum and I will always be there for him to guide him through any difficulties he may have.